Sorrow and Bliss by Meg Mason
When discussing this book with Sarah, I described it as being similar to ‘Fleabag’ which, surprisingly for a conventional sixty something man, was television that I considered unmissable. Martha, the talented and attractive forty year old narrator in this novel, comes out with a range of zingers that skewer social pretensions and modern foibles with the same impeccable timing as Waller-Bridge’s character. And, on the flipside, she shares Fleabag’s endless capacity to sabotage her own life. Much as I loved the black comedy of that television series, though, this novel was much more illuminating. Bluntly, it is about a woman with mental health issues who knows there is something wrong with her but which manifests itself in a sense of helplessness about her capability to change her damaging behaviour and dark moods as well as a lacerating sense of being useless.
Although the book moves back and forth to explore significant episodes from her life, we know that Martha is reflecting back in the aftermath of her separation from Patrick, her doctor husband. He loves Martha deeply, and has done since they were very young, and yet even his endless patience and understanding has a breaking point. He leaves their flat for his own sanity and Martha drifts back to her chaotic family home.
We learn that their relationship had deep roots and that both felt a sense of isolation when young. Patrick’s was physical as well as emotional: he arrives at Martha’s aunt and uncle’s family home for Christmas because his own father, living overseas, had simply forgotten that he wouldn’t be able to stay at boarding school for Christmas. Nicholas, Martha’s cousin, invites his school friend, Patrick, back to his own rather unusual extended family Christmas celebration. From then on, habit as well as Patrick’s genial, kind personality, see him incorporated into the extended family.
Martha’s isolation is the result of a prickly, distant relationship with a mother, whose low key but significant fame and success as modern sculptor, was based on an obsessive focus on her work; and it is now bolstered by quite a lot of alcohol. In contrast, Martha’s kindly but ineffectual father is a poet incapable of writing poetry. This is a bohemian household that barely functions and relies on Martha’s wealthy uncle and aunt to fund their artistic lifestyle.
As Martha looks back at her relationship with Patrick and her family, she and we understand that during the repetitive cycles of darkness and aimless behaviour, she was loved for herself by many people. Her foulmouthed and witty sister, Ingrid, has always been her warmest support and yet Martha can see that Ingrid’s own burgeoning family also need her. And that, of course, is what I like about this book – Martha, foremost, but most of the characters are kind and capable of unselfishness and understanding despite the muddle of their own lives. It’s also good to read a contemporary novel where not all the males are toxic. Although Martha sometimes maliciously views Patrick’s endless patience and devotion as someone trying too hard to be good, he has loved her deeply and forever, as someone rather surprisingly points out to her towards the end of the book.
There are revelations about Martha’s background and her condition at the end of the book. None of these were particularly revelatory but that was not the point. The key for me was that as Martha begins to analyse how she ended up separated from a husband, whom she loves and who loves her, the reader develops their own understanding of her condition; and, because she is fundamentally decent but damaged, we want her to find a way forward.
I was surprised to discover that this was a debut novel because the set pieces, such as the excruciating public marriage proposal by her first, very definitely toxic, husband, are handled with great skill incorporating laser sharp humour and real pathos. Yet, unlike many first novels I have read recently, the story has a sense of completion and a properly worked out structure. Most of all, though, it was moving and funny. Highly recommended.